Day 1
"Can you keep a secret?"
"Funny. I was just about to ask you the same thing."
Day 2
"So...I may or may not have been the one behind the fire..."
Day 3
"What. Is that."
"Um...I can explain!"
Day 4
On the porch, there was a teetering tower of gnomes ringing the doorbell.
Day 5
"I don't have time for this."
The dragon picks up a pistol. "I think you do."
Day 6
A ghost wanders through the living room, drifting into the kitchen to lecture the vampire and werewolf.
Day 7
"Wait, so you're scouting for candidates?"
"Yes."
"To work at an evil organization?"
"Yes."
"You know what? I'm in."
Day 8
"I tried to sign my name on the document, but it was too long. That's why I'm only half a ghost."
Day 9
"Breaking news! This just in: A giant spaceship has appeared in the upper atmosphere..."
Day 10
"This is your third chance."
"Third time's the charm?"
Day 11
To whom it may concern,
THE END IS NIGH.
Sincerely,
The Apocalypse
Day 12
"I never thought I'd sing the grim reaper a lullaby..."
Day 13
As it turns out, history class was pretty interesting. Especially since my teacher was a vampire and had all the good gossip from 1534.
Day 14
And that was when I knew I'd die. Death by kangaroo. Fantastic.
Day 15
The sign read: DO NOT ENTER UNLESS YOU DESIRE DEATH
Day 16
"There is no way I am doing this."
Guess what I was doing 5 minutes later?
Day 17
If there was anything I learned from my time as a teen, it was this: never let go of the reins on your gryphon.
Day 18
"Vigilantes can't exactly use health insurance, after all. That's where I come in."
Day 19
"So what you're telling me is, I'm now 100 years in the future?"
"Why is that so hard to believe?"
Day 20
Seriously? Thought the talking cat as the elderly lady fainted. What's so strange about a talking cat?
Day 21
Dear diary,
We're all going to die.
Day 22
"People are not supposed to purr!"
"Says who?"
Day 23
Writers are more evil than the most evil thing you can imagine, and here's my proof.
Day 24
"My entire life has been a lie..."
"Actually, the part about your aunt is true. Everything else? Utter hogwash."
Day 25
That was the day the butler finally snapped.
Day 26
Never date a superhero. Or, for that matter, a supervillain.
Day 27
I told him that I'd kill him if he died. He died.
Day 28
"Welcome to our mad little world."
Day 29
Even if I did manage to make it back home in one piece, I'd still fail that chemistry assignment. Death it was!
Day 30
"That's it, I'm quitting!"
"I'm pretty sure you can't quit a prophecy."
Day 31
Never try to ride a wild manticore.
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